It's Okay To Not Be Okay

      I love the title of this drama... It's about as honest as it gets... It really is okay to not be okay... And I love how the characters in the drama are all pretty messed up mentally and emotionally... Finally a drama where I can actually relate to the characters... I supposed that's why this drama was top 10 on Netflix... most of us can relate to at least one of the character in the drama... 

     The drama revolved around Moon Gang Tae and his autistic elder brother Moon Sang Tae who have been on the run from the 'butterflies' since the murder of their mother... Enter Ko Moon Yeong, a children's book author with an antisocial personality trait who happened to be Moon Sang Tae's favourite author... Gang Tae and Moon Yeong seemed to have got off on the wrong foot right from the start... But she somehow developed an obsession on Gang Tae and kept hunting him down...

     So as with all K-drama, the male and female lead would always have had a childhood encounter... Although in this case, it wasn't a pleasant encounter and as fate would have it, their past intertwined in a web of ugly mess which might have eventually destroyed their chance of finding healing and happiness...

     I like how Moon Yeong described Gang Tae as the 'safety pin' to her 'bomb'...  She's volatile and impulsive... He's patient and rational... Although that's not really how Gang Tae is... He just had to be that way for his brother's sake... I cried so much for Gang Tae... as I can relate to him much more than Moon Yeong... Gang Tae's mother told him that she had him so that he would take care of his elder brother... It's like that's the only use of Gang Tae in this world... Imagine growing up believing that... His life was so suppressed and repressed because of the burden he had to carry...

     Gang Tae never felt he could have a life of his own because he was 'stuck' to his brother... But then he fell in love with Moon Yeong and finally dared to dream of having his own life... Just as things seem to be going well, he discovered that his mother was actually murdered by Moon Yeong's psychopathic mother... I cried so hard when Gang Tae showed up for the family portrait shoot which Moon Yeong and Sang Tae wanted to have to make them a 'family'... The pain that Gang Tae was going through knowing the truth and yet wanting to protect them from knowing the truth... totally bawled my eyeballs out...

      I'm glad that Moon Yeong actually found love in Gang Tae... that poor girl had such a traumatic childhood it was amazing she actually grew up being functional physically... I think there's something hopeful about 2 emotionally and mentally dysfunctional souls finding healing and happiness in each other... It gives hope to emotionally and mentally dysfunctional souls like me that maybe we too can eventually find healing and happiness...

     I love the illustrations in Moon Yeong's books... It's very Tim Burton-esque... And I like how each episode is correlated to one of her books... I especially like The Cheerful Dog story... And how Gang Tae helped cut Moon Yeong's hair (symbolizing cutting off her leash)... Also the scene where Gang Tae punched the guy who slapped Moon Yeong and then he got suspended and he was so happy coz he finally could go on a trip with Moon Yeong... Yeah, ok, I love all the scenes where Gang Tae was smiling happily...

     So what I didn't understand was how did Moon Yeong's mother didn't die although her father killed her... Just goes to show it's so difficult for a bad person to die... And to think after all these years she still came back to haunt their lives and even tried to kill Gang Tae... Thank God for Sang Tae who saved the day...

     Anyway, I had a revelation on why and how girls ended up going crazy for Korean oppas from watching this drama... Took me so long to realize the power of positive reinforcement... So if anyone realized this, the male lead always have a few scenes where he gets oogled at by women... the girls would be all looking at the male lead and saying how good looking he is... Even if the person who was watching the drama probably didn't find the male lead good looking initially, after 16 episodes of such positive reinforcement, anyone would think Gong Yoo, Lee Jong Suk and Kim Soo Hyun good looking... Oh, this works vice versa too... That's why people think Jun Ji Hyun and Park So Dam are gorgeous...

     I guess if I tell myself that I'm gorgeous while looking in the mirror a few times a day I would eventually start believing that too... Well, it worked like magic for Lee Young Jun in What's Wrong With Secretary Kim? Might be worth a try...

What's Wrong With Secretary Kim?

      So I decided to bingewatch another Park Seo Joon k-drama while waiting for It's Okay Not To Be Okay to finish releasing its episode so I could bingewatch it... Ended up watching What's Wrong with Secretary Kim? Or my preferred title which is actually What's Wrong With Vice President Lee? Coz I lost count of the number of times I asked "What's wrong with that guy?" I have to say though that this Rom Com had me laughing in stitches thanks to the obnoxiously narcissistic character of the male lead Lee Young Jun...

     I almost gave up watching it after the 1st episode coz I couldn't stand Lee Young Jun... Secretary Kim aka Kim Mi So is a saint for being able to put up with her boss for 9 years... Having dated a narcissist, I really do have a strong aversion towards such character... But I suppose this is the magic of K-drama: I went from "Ugh! I can't stand this obnoxious narcissistic guy!" in the first 8 episodes to "😍😍😍 I so want to marry this guy!" in the last 8 episodes... The heart is such a fickle creature! But of course, in reality, a narcissist never changes its stripes...

     If there's a persistent theme in all these idol series, it is this: the male lead and the female lead have always met when they were younger... Either in their preteen / teen years...And somehow they were separated and met again as destiny intended a decade or 2 later... In this drama, young Lee Young Jun (or Lee Sung Hyeon), age 9 and Kim Mi So, age 5 were kidnapped by a mentally disturbed woman who ended up hanging herself in front of the 2 kids... Sung Hyeon managed to free both of them and brought Mi So home... she then proposed to him saying that they should get married when they grow up... Sung Hyeon agreed and even made a pinky promise with her... However, by the time Sung Hyeon emerged from the traumatic experience and went back to look for Mi So, the neighbourhood no longer existed as it was being turned into an amusement park by Sung Hyeon's father's company...

     So here's the thing, I've had the same experience of proposing to a guy at a tender age of 5 while we were lying under the seats of our school bus on our way back from kindergarten almost on a daily basis (that poor boy, he must have been so traumatized)... of course he never said yes and there was no pinky promise... and by the time I met him again in high school, I didn't think I wanted to marry him at all... And he, having had to go through such trauma probably avoided me at all cost... But yeah, that's real life for you...

     I guess my opinion of Lee Young Jun changed a little after I realized that he was the guy Mi So was looking for and he recognized her when she first started working in his company... But Mi So didn't recognize him coz she forgot his name and the whole traumatic experience... She only remembered there was an oppa who showed her kindness and comforted her when she was scared and alone... He didn't tell her back then because he thought it was good that she didn't remember because he grew up remembering the traumatic experience and being haunted by nightmares of the dead woman every day of his life while having to pretend that he didn't remember anything about it... Coz his useless elder brother developed false memory that he was the one being kidnapped and caused so much havoc for the family... Oh, and that's another persistent theme in k-dramas: the chaebol always has a traumatic childhood experience that leaves him scarred for life and can only be cured by the love of the female lead

     I suppose Young Jun's character was his defense mechanism... He kept young women at bay because he was traumatized by a young woman... He had to live a life of perfection and keep telling himself how great and awesome he was to keep his psyche from falling apart... He thought by making Mi So his secretary, he would be able to keep her by his side always... until the day she told him she was going to quit her job and find her own life... I guess that's when his facade of Mr Perfect fell apart...

     If I thought his excessive self-confidence and self-love was funny, I found his attempts to romance Mi So even funnier... Watching Park Seo Joon's goofy crinkly-eyed grin whenever he's pleased with himself and thinking of Mi So just gets to me every time... Yes, I have a weakness for men with crinkly-eyed smiles... 

     I learned a new term in the drama... The curse of the blockbuster... Apparently this is where a guy brings a girl on a blockbuster date (meaning an extravagant and elaborate date that requires a lot of money) and the girl will find all dates with other ordinary men less desirable... Pretty accurate I suppose...

     Of course there was a happy ending for this couple... A guy like Lee Young Jun will always get his girl... But I especially love the proposal part (and also the funny scenes when he's trying to think of ways to propose)... Of course the chaebol always knows how to play the piano... And so Young Jun was playing the piano and singing his heart out for Mi So... And as he was proposing, he said he will sing for her for the rest of their lives (coz Mi So said his lullaby calms her down and helps her fall asleep)... I thought that was the most romantic thing, ever... 

     Okay, it's time to watch It's Okay Not To Be Okay now...

Itaewon Class: Find me a Park Saeroyi

     So after Hospital Playlist, I decided to take a break from bingeing on K-dramas as I was afraid I might start speaking Korean in my dreams... Then my OT sister suggested I should watch Itaewon Class if i wasn't looking for a mushy lovey-dovey romantic K-drama... which I did... And I fell hook, line, sinker for Park Saeroyi... No, I don't have a crush on Park Seo Joon (the actor who played Park Saeroyi) and I did have a wee bit of a problem with Park Saeroyi's bowl cut (or chestnut cut)... But I've never been one who is so shallow as to judge a guy from his hairstyle...

     I know this might cause an outcry (maybe even a boycott) from every female, but I really do prefer Park Saeroyi to Ri Jeong Hyeok (although I'm still in the process of getting over my Hyun Bin crush)... I love Park Saeroyi for his resolute determination... from sticking to his principles and integrity... to not giving up in reaching his goals and ambitions... Despite going through a series of unfortunate events... from being expelled from high school for standing up against a bully, to losing his father in the hands of the said bully, to ending up in jail for assaulting the same bully...

     He had a high school crush, Oh Soo Ah, who ended up working for his enemy's company... He told her that he liked her but she told him not to fall for her and that she will only date rich men... So he was determined to become rich... But of course his first and ultimate goal was to destroy his enemy, Jang Dae Hee and his son Jang Geung Won (who killed Saeroyi's father)... Anyway, Soo Ah probably liked Saeroyi too... But she made her life decisions which prevented her from being with Saeroyi... She thought Saeroyi's feelings for her would never change, which was why she took it for granted and prioritized her goals over him... 

     Enter Jo Yi Seo into Saeroyi's life... I must say this female protagonist was initially quite antagonistic... She brought nothing but trouble to Saeroyi... but through their interactions and unexpected encounters, she realized her psychotic/ sociopathic self was actually capable of having feelings for a person of the opposite sex... I even like how she stole Saeroyi's first kiss... And I loved how she told Saeroyi that she will help make his dreams come true... And how she was betting her life on him... And that she would destroy the ppl who messed with him... Indeed, who knew having a woman with psychopathic/ sociopathic tendency who is obsessively in love with you would be beneficial to your business development and success...

     I loved how the Itaewon Class team consisted of various misfits who all came together and became like a family... But I supposed if you had a boss like Park Saeroyi, you would even die for his cause... Saeroyi is one of such rare character who really walked the talk and never compromised his integrity and always valued his people... There's no way you wouldn't trust your life with him... from his ex-cellmate gangster Choi Seung Gwon, the transgender cook Ma Hyun Yi, the bastard child of Jang Dae Hee, Jang Geun Soo to the 'foreigner' black half Korean Kim Toni, Saeroyi saw the potential and value in each of them...

     Although Park Saeroyi was the leader every team dreamed of having, I must say that the true brains were really Jo Yi Seo and Lee Ho Jin (the high school kid who was the bully victim of Jang Geung Won)... Jo Yi Seo was the brilliant manager whose social influencing and marketing skills propelled Danbam to fame and success... And Lee Ho Jin was the genius hedge fund manager who helped turn Saeroyi's millions into billions... I think I need a genius hedge fund manager for myself too...

     I know this would unlikely happen in real life but I was so happy when Park Saeroyi finally realized that he was in love with Jo Yi Seo... Although he was probably already in love with her even from the beginning... But because of his sense of loyalty to his high school crush Soo Ah and also his sense of loyalty to his 'brother' Jang Geun Soo (Geun Soo was in love with Yi Seo), he felt that he couldn't have feelings for Yi Seo... At least in this drama, the girl who gave her everything for the guy got the guy in the end...

     There are only 3 kissing scenes between Saeroyi and Yi Seo throughout the drama which made all the romance between these 2 socially inept beings all the more sweeter and heart-warming... There was a scene in the final episode where Yi Seo asked Saeroyi if he liked her... He answered, no, I love you... It's probably lame and cheesy coming from any other guy... But coming from Saeroyi, I wouldn't mind hearing it a thousand times... 

     I do wonder, if I've been living my life like Oh Soo Ah or Jo Yi Seo... Regretfully, I think I've been more like Oh Soo Ah... But I supposed I've never met a Park Saeroyi... So I've never felt like I could bet my life on anyone... So here's a take home message from Itaewon Class: if you ever met a Jo Yi Seo in your life, be a Park Saeroyi to her and never lose her no matter what you do... and if I ever find a Park Saeroyi in my life, I'll be a Jo Yi Seo for him... I'll definitely bet my life on him and help him make his dreams come true...