Saturday, January 9, 2010

Questions, Questions, Questions....

Have you ever felt the saying 'what goes around comes around' ring true in your life? i started my new year 2 years ago by becoming single after saying goodbye to my boyfriend of almost 5 years... this year, i'm starting my new year by still being single, but has just been spurned by a guy i have supposedly dated recently...for less than 5 months....actually it's less than 3 months...

How is it that when you know that 2 ppl are just not meant to be together, you still managed to get involved in an unsanctioned, doomed-to-fail kind of relationship? i supposed you need to be a super loser, super pushover and super doormat....

How can someone be so into you initially and quickly lose interest and becomes cold? i dunno... perhaps men are just generally jerks and assholes...

Is there a difference between feeling wanted and feeling loved? i think there is...but sometimes you just can't seem to decide which of it that you want and everything kind of becomes messy...

Have you ever vow to yourself after your last relationship that you won't allow yourself to cry becoz of a man anymore? and somehow, you still end up crying becoz of a man? i guess some of us never really learn from mistakes huh?

Have you ever find yourself falling for guys your mother told you exactly not to? i guess you always do stupid things like that in the hopes of proving your mom wrong huh? maybe it's a self-worth issue thingy...

Which is greater love? A love so magnanimous that you're willing to let go of that love if it means less pain/better future for the one you love? Or a love that is willing to fight through the pains and obstacles that come along its way? i think i have yet to meet a guy who would do the latter for me... i guess all my previous guys have been incredibly magnanimous huh?

Have you ever read the book that goes by the title of 'he's just not so into you'...or something like that? don't even remember who the author is...but i just realized i don't really need to read that book...coz i'm damn good at reading those subliminal messages that men send out when they're just not so into you anymore...

What do you do when your guy doesn't want you anymore? do you blame yourself? do you hate him for causing you pain? do you beg him to take you back and promise you'll be better? here's my 2-cent worth...don't blame yourself coz most of the time, it's not your fault...and he's not worth you putting in so much emotion as to hate him...and don't bother begging him to take you back... have some self-dignity....

Why is it when you know you're getting yourself involved in a doomed-to-fail relationship, you still hold on to your hopeless romanticism and hope against hope that somehow things will work out? i guess some of us had fairy-tale and romance overdose when we were younger...

I still have so many questions...and yet, it is probably useless to keep asking questions we don't really have answers for when things go wrong...i supposed i should really thank God for His timing... He knew i was heading for doom but He loved me so much that He didn't allow me to continue in doom...and He knew i'd be too cowardly to break free so He put it in the guy to do it...

Anyway, thanks for the good memories...though they're short-lived...thanks for being the brave one to put an end to a doomed-to-fail relationship...though i shouldn't have allowed it to start in the first place...i hope you'll be happy with your new girl...and hopefully i'll be happy with my new guy...if that ever happens...oh well, que sera sera...

3 comments:

  1. take it easy, kat...better to let it go than to suffer later on. someone better will come along...cheer up and enjoy life...love reading your travel posts...:)

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  2. Whoa....who's that asshole la?

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  3. thanks kee fong...i'm sure i'll meet someone better....but for now the hermit is gonna crawl further into her shell and nurse her wounds...
    will tell you more when i see you che...

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